Hope = crap

Yes, I'm now in Vancouver. Last night I watched Shawshank Redemption with my old bean. The movie is pretty fun to watch, entertaining from start to finish. It's got a few famous lines that people repeat, such as "hope is a good thing, may be the best of things, and a good thing never dies," and "hope is a dangerous thing."

I don't feel that hope is a good thing, but neither do I think it dangerous. I just feel that hope is crap, meaningless. I don't think it is a big loss at all if I just die tonight. It might be pretty cool to eventually graduate from the stupid program or get to play Final Fantasy XIX or whatever, but to endure all the hardships and boredom most hours of most days of my life just to enjoy for that little bit is so not worthwhile. It is kinda like eating a crab: all that hard work just to eat that little meat is a good waste of time and effort.

Perhaps I should find a job that is ridiculously life-threatening but not physically demanding (is there even such a job?), since I get the strong feeling that I might just meet the same end as young Werther did, though for vastly different reasons.